Guys should act confident, smile and listen on a first date.
STORY HIGHLIGHTS
- 10 first date rules for guys include: Smile, ask questions and listen
- Guys should act confident and use flattery appropriately
- Take charge of date, deciding when and where and please pay
- Watch your body language and no pawing on first date
(The Frisky) -- Ah, first dates. So nerve-wracking. If only you knew exactly what was going to happen, then you could plan out everything in advance. But first dates are kind of like playing the lottery. You've got to be in it to win it, but sometimes you end up empty-handed. If you're a woman, you know these sorts of situations don't always go so smoothly.
If you're a guy, here are 10 tips that can make the first date easier on all of us.
Take charge. We do not want to decide where to go. We will never tell you this, but it is true. Ask us what kind of place and/or food we like; then, pick a place like that. Do not leave it up to us to choose. You are the man. Act like one.
Smile. When we arrive, smile. Maybe you are a tough guy. Maybe you are nervous. Maybe you are paralyzed. Either way, smile. Women are strange, exotic, intuitive creatures, and we respond well to positive reinforcement. Do not glower.
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Mind your body language. If your legs are crossed and your hand is over your mouth, we will unconsciously think you are hiding something. If you are sprawled out all over with your legs spread wide and your hands behind your head, we will think you are a slob or generally loose. Sit up straight, lean in closer, and keep your hands where we can see them.
Ask questions. This seems obvious, but it's surprising how many men don't do this. You know what women like? Attention. Also, kittens, flowers, and cupcakes. Nothing else. If you seem curious about the woman sitting across from you, she will like it. For sure.
Listen. You can't just ask a bunch of questions, and then not listen to the answers. They call this a "date," but, really, for women, it's more like a "test." If you e-mailed or talked on the phone beforehand, remember what the hell she told you about herself. If you forget, we will feel angry and want to leave. Then you will be sorry.
Use flattery, appropriately. If at some point during our meeting, you tell us we are "beautiful," "attractive," or "pretty," we will like you better than if you didn't. It's. Just. That. Simple.
Act confident. We really do not care if you are secretly neurotic, deeply insecure, or mildly nuts. We are interested in how you portray yourself. Act confident, interested, engaged, self-assured, ambitious, and happy. We like that. Thanks.
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No pawing allowed. If you're going to score with us at some point, we will let you know. Trust. Occasional physical contact is OK -- a hand to the small of the back, a touch of the thigh, a brief holding of the arm while making a point. Do not grab anywhere in the red light zones. If we want your hands there, we will put them there.
Please pay. Feminism, shmeminism. Take care of the bill without comment. That is what we want. Wave off any offer to go dutch. We lied. We don't want to pay half.
Say goodnight. Don't meander off into the night. Do something. What -- that is up to you: a handshake, a hug, a kiss. Do it right, and you might get a second date
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FAQs
However, this isn't a time clock saying you have to fall in love in only 10 dates. The 10-date rule merely states that men are most likely to seek relationships with women they've dated at least 10 times. These are real dates, not hangouts or coffee meet-ups.
What is the 10 date rule men? ›
However, this isn't a time clock saying you have to fall in love in only 10 dates. The 10-date rule merely states that men are most likely to seek relationships with women they've dated at least 10 times. These are real dates, not hangouts or coffee meet-ups.
Do guys expect a kiss on the first date? ›
No, and roughly half of first dates don't end in a kiss. Only about 53% of first dates actually end with a kiss. You should only kiss if it's what you both want. A guy who's truly interested in you will be happy to wait for your first kiss.
What percentage of guys kiss on the first date? ›
If you feel the attraction and you feel the desire to kiss, lean in a little and see if your date leans in with you," suggests law of attraction expert Christy Whitman. While 53% of first dates end with a kiss, when you should share a first kiss with someone is really up to you and the other person.
Is it appropriate to kiss on the first date? ›
Lean into your instincts.
So, if kissing your date is something you'd really like to do—plus, your date is open to it—lean into what you feel is right and kiss on the first date. The key is to go with what your instincts are telling you, while also being respectful to your date's boundaries.
How many dates before sleeping together? ›
A second study in 2017 asked men and women specifically how many dates they usually waited before having a sexual experience with their partner. On average, men reported waiting about five dates, and women reported a preference of waiting closer to nine dates. Overall the average was about eight dates.
How many dates before a guy kisses you? ›
Many people will share some form of kiss on a first date, but it might be more of a peck than a snog. Though some will feel ready for a full on smooch if the chemistry is right. Others might wish to wait until date number two or three before they lock lips with someone.
Do guys fall in love after kissing? ›
Does a guy fall in love by kissing? We couldn't say for sure. In scientific terms, though, what happens when we kiss is that the reward centers in our brains are unlocked, releasing a flow of oxytocin and vasopressin, the chemicals that make people feel happy and attached to someone else.
Do guys like when you kiss them first? ›
Still, in short, the answer is a whopping YES. Most men love it. In fact, they might just encourage the act to the secret society of unsure women.
What age do most guys have their first kiss? ›
Though the average age for young people to experience a first kiss is fifteen, there is absolutely no reason to rush into it because “everyone else is doing it” or you want to feel “normal.” After all, what good is a kiss if it comes with a side of regret?
Part your lips slightly and press them against their lips.
Gently kiss them for several seconds. Try not to get any of your saliva onto their lips. It's okay to keep your lips pressed together during your kiss. Don't open your mouth or use tongue during your first kiss.
How do guys feel after kissing a girl for the first time? ›
It depends on the individual man and woman involved in the kiss. However, in general, a man may feel happy, excited, loved, or satisfied when he kisses a woman. Additionally, kissing can be seen as an intimate act that can strengthen emotional bonds between people.
Would a man kiss you if he didn't like you? ›
A guy won't initiate a kiss without being interested, no. However, it is possible he hasn't responded because he somehow lost interest, or he could be waiting to say something. Two days isn't an extreme time frame. Some guys wait 3 to 5 days to text or call.
Do you hug on the first date? ›
In some cultures, it's standard to greet with a kiss or two on the cheek, but others might find this to be too much. In that case, a simple handshake or even a casual hug will suffice. According to experts, one of the most important dating reminders is gauging your date's comfort levels.
Does he like me if he kissed me on the first date? ›
Your date could tell you that they find you extremely good looking and that you're just their type. They may feel more comfortable kissing you on a first date because it's easy to physically connect with you. That one kiss could be enough to satisfy their appetite, or they may be interested in even more.
What is the 10 day rule in dating? ›
The 10 Date Rule is: Men are the most likely to have a relationship with a woman that they have gone on at least 10 dates with. These are proper dates, not coffee catch-ups, sleeping together or hanging out together. The dates are where you go out together in public and do something.
What is the 90 10 men rule? ›
The secret to dissatisfaction
You like 90% of your partner's habits but that last 10% gets on your first and last nerve. They might be forgetful. They may leave the house looking like a natural disaster. Perhaps there is something physical about them you want to change.
What is the 90 day rule for men? ›
What Is the 90-Day Rule for Dating and Why Does It Matter? The 90-day dating rule suggests waiting 90 days after you start dating someone to have sex with them. Both men and women can follow the 90-day dating rule as it's intended to help develop close and long-lasting relationships.
How many dates until a guy is serious? ›
“Men want connection, true connection, as much as women do. In general, they're a little slower at forming that connection than women are, and 10 dates is a good rule of thumb. A man is not going to continue asking you out if he's not interested, and if he asks you out on 10 dates, he's into you.”
